Not too badly for last Saturday though when thanks to my good friends Steve and Nat, I got a free ticket to the Lovebox Saturday. I couldn't really turn this one down, could I? So, off we went to Old Street and then had to run for a bus, which frothed up the Kronenbourg I was carrying and consequently meant I sat on the bus reeking of alcohol looking like I'd pissed myself. With such legendary antics already occuring Lovebox was sure to be a good one...
MORE BLOODY QUEUING
Festival organisers of Britain - SORT IT OUT!
I'm not sure how what appeared to be at least seven gates for entry turned into two huge queues, but it still happened. To be fair, the entry process speeded up when more gates opened, but honestly, how long have they been running this thing? On getting to the front gate one was confronted with a large police presence, more so than at any other festival this year and weren't mucking about when it came to drugs. I, of course, was squeaky clean and so once had breezed in, and the rain had started, it was time to leg it through the festival for:
THE SUPER FURRY ANIMALS
Admittedly, what with all the queuing, we only made it to the last 15 minutes of the set. Just in time for a superb version of teenage crowd-pleaser 'The Man Don't Give A Fuck' and to watch Gruff Rhys put his Power Ranger helmet on and rip into a guitar solo. Which is good considering he's now signed as a solo artist to Rough Trade as well. Well done, Gruff!
GILLES PETERSON
By now it had started to bucket down and we fought our way into the 'Strangelove' dance tent, hands gripping cans of Red Stripe like our lives depended on it. Here's Nat and Steve in the tent:
The DJ of the hour was Gilles Peterson. Whole gigs-worth of servers have been written on how much fun Peterson is and how much he means to dance and world music. All of which is true, he embodies a jazz spirit by being rather short and isn't adverse to dropping something as classic as 'Apache' into the middle of a set.
Halfway through the set, Peterson was joined on the stage by a group of people dressed as characters from the movie Dr Strangelove. All this business was a little unnecessary, complete with the getting naked during the set. I'm there to dance!
JUNIOR BOYS
Weird electro outfit from Canada. Still enjoyable stuff from the mainstage. The new Pet Shop Boys (without the angst)?
THE SCRATCH PERVERTS
Tony Vegas, DJ Plus One and Prime Cuts - all three were on hand to deliver some true party set festival style dancing. Unafraid to drop classic after classic and have the crowd try and keep up with their cut-up shenanigans. I was delighted cos they played pretty much the whole of Intergalactic without scratching it beyond recognition. Very enjoyable, now why weren't they that up for it at every Blowpop I've seen them at?
MEANWHILE, BACK OUTSIDE...
It had turned into a lovely day. Finally the Glasto-curse had moved on and we were free to experience some festivalling again.
Okay, so the size of Lovebox may be pretty small compared to that of Glastonbury, but it was just about right. The right number of people, the right level of facilities, except for ladies loos, where the queues are astronomical and you could get pretty close to the stages. There were plentiful bars too, which would have been perfect had it not been for:
THE WORST IDEA AT FESTIVAL BARS EVER
Up until Saturday this had been 'not selling unlabelled bottles of Brothers Bar Cider', now we have a new champion.
http://www.peppermintbars.co.uk/
This is the web address of bar managment company Peppermint Bars. They were tasked with running the festival bars at Lovebox. Unlike the Workers Beer Company, Peppermint have a more unique way of doing things. You order your drink, the bar person serves you and then...
GOES TO A TILL TO GET YOUR CHANGE?!
That's right, all your orders are rung up on a till and your change handed to the bar person who, after waiting for it, then returns it to you. This process of waiting must add an extra two or three minutes to the wait time. Then, they give you a RECEIPT! What do they think I'm going to do? Put my tab on expenses?! "Yeah, load up on the cans of Red Stripe, I know they're £3.20 a go, but I reckon if I get a receipt I can stick it all on the account!" What a joke. All this did was cause anger and frustration, as queues became almost five deep at the bar, especially when the till had to have its printer roll replaced. GAHHHHH! I needed something to cheer me up, I marched back to the mainstage.
Before the next act came on we were lucky enough to catch champion beatboxer and Lovebox legend Beardyman.
This guy was really brilliant. See, just how brilliant by watching the video (from last year) below. Beardyman pretends to be a lecturer and then astounds a crowd.
BLONDIE
I kinda saw SOUL II SOUL from a distance, but not enough to warrant a gig report and so onwards to one of the most iconic bands of the 20th century. Playing what can only be described as 'hit after hit after hit', BLONDIE were magnificent and beautiful, hair and all.
This really was the greatest hits show. The band was tight, Harry could still sing, even though she looked a little bit like a drunken auntie dancing at a wedding. It didn't matter though, this was camp as tits and all the better for it. Even managing an encore with 'Heart of Glass' this was gig of the festival for me and really showed up the headlining act...
But it took 45 mins for them to come on and so it was time for some limbo dancing:
SLY AND THE FAMILY STONE
Well... they did 'Dance to the Music' first, even though 'Sly' didn't actually show up on stage until four songs in. Popbitch reckon he'd been shopping in the West End for new clothes when he'd realised they needed him on stage. He managed to do one song, before announcing that he "had to take a piss" and then only came on again to do one before the 10:30pm finish. A virtual hunchback, Sly could certainly sing, but for a finale act it looked more like a standard soul band with way too many walks on the bass. And the rain returned. A slightly disappointing end to an otherwise brilliant day.
So, not bad for free! If you're holding a festival and want me to come and review it, then let me know and I may just do that... Free entry, mind.
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